Grandma Doll Does Charity

* I donated these miniatures to Aprilsarmy.etsy.com, a charity shop on Etsy. This month's money will go to Jason, who will use the donations for expenses while getting experimental treatments for pancreatic cancer. Please check out the shop, and 'heart' Grandma's jugs!*

Grandma Doll needs to get her jugs reduced. She says her jug collection is way too large, and they are spilling out all over the place. They are in the way, and have to be lifted from place to place to makeroom. So much so that Grandma says her shoulders hurt from hauling them around. Her jugs are so big that when she lays down they fall into her armpits! That is way too big! Her collection, I mean.

Grandpa doesn't want her to get a jug reduction. He likes her jugs just fine the way they are. Grandpa begged her to reconsider, but Grandma insisted. Grandpa finally agreed to take pictures ofGrandma's overabundant collection.
Grandpa took a very long time photographing Grandma's jugs. It really seemed to cheer him up.

These jugs are about one inch tall. One of them hasa crack in the bottom, but it is hard to see unless you lay them on the floor and lie on top of them and smoosh them up toyour chin.

Miniature Monday - Something Ain't Reitz

Grandma and Grandpa Doll got a big box in the mail. It was from a grumpy middle aged potter lady they know. They were very excited to see what it was, because they like to collect pottery.

But when they opened the bowl they were disappointed.

It was a big, big bowl with crusty things on it. The note said it was a platter miniature done in a visceral style similar to Don Reitz.

"Who the heck is Don Reitz?" asked Grandpa.

"Well, he is kinda messy, I am guessing, " replied Grandma. "What does visceral mean?"

They didn't know, so they looked it up.

"It means 'having to do with the viscera, or intestines,' " Grandpa read.

"Guts? She sent us a Guts Platter??? What the hell was she thinking?"
Grandma sometimes says bad words when she is confused.

They discussed it and decided to sell the bowl. Having a big guts platter hanging on the wall is not their idea of art.

Grandpa said, "It's too bad that potter lady spends her time trying to make things like that. If she just used her feelings and intuition when she made her stuff, it would turn out better. "

"Yes," answered Grandma, "I wish she would just make pottery that gave you an immediate emotional reaction rather than trying to get all fancy. "

If you want to buy this miniature, it is available in my shop on Etsy.

Miniature Monday - A Real Dish!

Grandma overheard Grandpa telling a friend that Grandma was a Real Dish when they met.

This confused Grandma, but she wasn't surprised. Her memories the 70's are a bit fuzzy. She says that during that time she was doing personal medical research with herbal and fungal remedies and they caused her all sorts of problems. She does remember some things, though.

She remembers having the munchies quite often, and for a short time being able to hear colors. She also remembers feeling like she was made of stone sometimes too.

So maybe she was a Real Dish when she met Grandpa. Maybe the memories of munchies was really the sense of emptiness of being a vessel? A bowl maybe? Maybe something stone-like?

So she looked at her old pottery and found a blue bowl that looked pretty familiar. Was this the dish she was?

She is not sure, but just in case she is selling the bowl. She says it all just really freaks her out, man.

The bowl is made from porcelain. It is one inch wide and about 1/2 inch tall. You can see it in my Etsy shop.

Miniature Monday - What a Crock!

Sometimes Grandma Doll can't sleep. When that happens, she stays up late and watches infomercials. Last week Grandma watched an infomercial about a wonderful pot that every person needs. She tried to order one, but found that the company had gone out of business.

So, she contacted a certain grumpy, middle aged potter she knew and asked her to make one for the advertised price of three easy payments of 19.99 each.

The potter agreed.

But, when it arrived, Grandma Doll was disappointed. While it looked just right - dark blue and green, made of porcelain on a potter's wheel, .75 inches tall and .5 inches wide, with lid - it just wasn't right.

It wasn't right, because, unlike the one in the commercial, this pot did not magically fill with 'nourishing and delicious' food when left-overs were slow-cooked in it. In reality, when it was filled with left-overs and slow cooked all you got was a disgusting mess!

It was a defective crock! And Grandma should know, since she has been serving crock to her family for years. Why, the whole family knows crock when they see it, and that ain't it!

So they are selling this pot, at a discount. But, if you are a connoisseur of crock, this one may not be what you are looking for.

(Side Note: If you have no idea who Grandma and Grandpa Doll are, then you might want to read more about them here, in the miniature section of my shop. They get into all sorts things there!
(Other side Note, about yesterday's blog. The teapot is not the freebie. Sorry. Look for the LITTLE picture in the corner. Yeah, not as exciting. Sorry. :P)

Miniature Mondays

I am not good at self motivation sometimes. Just look at my blog! I went almost five months without blogging. FIVE! And why? I just love writing, I love to tell others about my family, I love to talk pottery. I should be addicted to blogging! Yet, without outside motivation, I don't do it!
Weird, eh?

Miniatures are another thing I just really enjoy. I enjoy making them, I enjoy photoing them, and I really, really enjoy writing the listings about them for my Etsy shop. But how long has it been since I listed any new ones? Far, far too long.

So, while I was writing this listing, I was thinking, "What can I do to create outside motivation for me to blog, on a regular basis, AND to get me to list my miniatures?"

Well, here is my Big Idea!

Miniature Mondays! I will list a miniature, and then blog about it. And if I commit, in writing (here) to my hordes (three) faithful blog followers, then I am sure to do it.

Yeah, yeah, I know today is Friday, not Monday. But the mini I listed is too great to wait the weekend. So this one is for priming the pump, and a new one will be on Monday.
Here goes! You will find this listing in my Etsy shop, here. And on Monday will be the next Chapter in the Doll family story! Brilliant, huh?


Green Spiral Dish Miniature

Grandpa just admitted that for a long time now, he has had a dish on the side.

Grandma had been cleaning out the closet in the bedroom when she came across a box that was marked "Private, Do Not Open". So, of course she opened it, and inside was a low, porcelain bowl or deep plate, glazed jade green and high fired. There was a pretty spiral in the middle and some lovely red flashing along one side. It was about 1.25 inches wide. She didn't remember ever seeing it before. Along with the bowl were letters, tied with a ribbon. The letters were in Grandpa's handwriting, and they were full of intimate side dish recipes, written with obvious passion.

Grandma was understandably upset. For years she had served meals, warm and willing, right there in her kitchen, so what was this all about??

When confronted, Grandpa admitted that, while he still loved Grandma's cooking, lately he had found her meals boring. "Just main course, potatoes and a microwaved veg every day! Meal after meal after meal. I need some spice. I need adventure. I need creative side dishes!"

Grandpa said he would be willing to sell his dish on the side if Grandma was willing to spice up her side dishes some. He even offered to let her read the intimate recipes he had written for his side dish, but Grandma refused. She said that she would get out her old Joy of Cooking book and figure out things on her own, but she refused to try the sordid ideas he had fantasized with his "porcelain hussy".

So the dish on the side is up for sale, and Grandma is trying to add some spice to her life. What will happen next?